Italian Trains

The first rule of Italian trains is that unless you are catching them at the origin of their trip, they are always late.

We have probably caught 10 trains now. Current record is 42 minutes late on a 1:58 trip. The only time you will see a conductor is the one trip that you mistakenly get on the wrong train. Thus you get a fine for being on a 1st class train when you've paid for 2nd class.

Some of the trains have barn doors between carriages.  These are most accurately described as Italian agents of death. They are spring loaded so when you try to walk through them they are constantly trying to close on you. If you follow someone through them you're likely to get a door to the face as they try and close.  Then when you're thorough, they oscillate for about a week before returning to their home position. To complete the happy picture they are noisy.

At least the trains are relatively clean.

Italian death agents. More effective than any Mafia hit man.